When I found out I was pregnant with LB, it was just me, home alone on Martin Luther King Day. I worked for the state, so I enjoyed nearly every holiday off. Cambre was at work so I had all day to let the news sink in and to prepare a surprise for him when he got home. I made a cute little note and hid it in the cabinet so he would be surprised when he opened it. I made brownies and had ice cream to celebrate our good news. We talked and shared our excitement together, dreaming of how life would change with a baby.
Fast forward almost two years.
I run into town for a few errands, grab a test while I’m out, come home, try to keep LB occupied for a few minutes, and go see what the verdict is. It wasn’t long before two pink lines showed up and I sat in the bathroom floor in complete shock. “No way!” I couldn’t help but say out loud. Apparently that triggered my boy to come see where I had disappeared to, so he comes toddling back to the bathroom to join in on the fun. In a complete state of shock I sent the picture to Cambre and said “does this say what I think it says?!”
Two very different scenarios. Isn’t it funny how just one little kiddo can change things? 🙂
Please don’t misunderstand me, we prayed for this baby and wanted this baby. He or she just came a long a little quicker than we expected. It took a lot longer the first time, so we figured we would have to wait a while for this one too. But it was in the Lord’s plans for it to happen now, and we are beyond grateful for His timing.
When we were expecting LB, I could think about him, life with him in it, think of a name for him, and really feel like I “knew” him even before I had him. I thought about him a lot… maybe because I couldn’t help but remember I was pregnant. Being pregnant was hard work, and I hadn’t experienced that yet. I was sick the entire 40 weeks, had terrible food aversions in the beginning, could not sleep enough, and had aches and pains in places I had never ached before.
With this one, I was beyond relieved to hear a strong heart beat on our ultrasound because the symptoms just haven’t been as severe. I have felt nauseous and still do, but nothing like the first time. Hallelujah! I still can’t get enough sleep, but energy is starting to come back. Usually by 8:00 pm, I’m spent for the day. 🙂 So far I really haven’t felt any aches or pains, but my complexion is really leaving a lot to be desired. All of this, plus the ring on a string test, tell me I’m carrying a girl. My husband firmly believes we’ll have another boy. Time will tell. 🙂 I’m perfectly fine with either one.
It’s been hard for this pregnancy to really sink in with me… I think between already being a mother and having less intense pregnancy symptoms, that is common. The excitement is definitely there this time around, although I will admit, it is a different kind of excitement. I’m very much looking forward to that wonderful newborn smell and the squishyness that comes with a brand new baby. I’m so excited to see what another baby out of the same parents will look like… Will he or she look like LB, or look more like me this time? I can’t wait to see LB in his ‘big brother’ shirt at the hospital. But then my mind shifts and I think “How on earth can I parent two kids? How will LB react to a new baby?” Our circumstances are different this time, so our concerns are different. I’m beginning to tell myself that is OK and normal. I’m also reminding myself that the days (and nights!) are long, but the years are oh so short. I’ve already learned that lesson and can’t help but stare at LB and wonder where my little baby went.
I would love to hear if you experienced any thoughts similar to mine the second, or third time around.
How did life change once your second baby arrived?